christian funeral jokes

A simple place to rest and be, As we walk through Heavens land. Adam bit the apple and, feeling great shame, covered himself with a fig leaf. We were making leaflets for a local church, and the client wanted a logo designed with Earth being shielded by the hand of God. Eventually, she returned to her hometown for a visit and on a Saturday night went to confession in the church, that she had always attended as a child. when we on Him will lean. or you can smile because she has lived. The preacher got excited and said, "Whoa!" The first guy says, Ive suffered from back pain for years. Read up on our religious jokes, Christian Jokes and more that will have you laughing in church. Aloud for help, the Master standeth by, No, not always so; In the foyer of a church, a young boy was looking at a plaque with the names of men and women who had died in various wars. He asked the pastor, "Who are these people?" But he soon regretted his decision to order office supplies over the phone. You may laugh or turn up your nose, but we Then she went behind the bush to try on a maple leaf, a sycamore, and an oak. Another man, straining to hear, shouted, I cant hear you! Walt replied, I wasnt talking to you. Richard Steussy. the man laughed. When my son, William, was young, we belonged to a small country church. I wish so much you wouldnt cry Gold! one child yelled.Frankincense! shouted another. You can now hear the other teachers and parent friends politely declining or signing the planned absence notes. When he removed the letter from the envelope, it had one word written on it-"Fool"! Heres an idea to use with a rescue mannequin or something similar: Tape or hang a funny sign on it that says: Some jokes are best out of view from clientelelike this one. When I asked my friend if she was planning to attend church, she just shook her head. Knowing your audience is the key to delivering a good joke that receives a great response. She stepped out of the confessional and within sight of Father OMalley, she went into a series of cartwheels, leaping splits, handsprings, and back flips. The Anglican turned to the Catholic and asked, Do you think we ought to tell him where the stepping stones are?. I hope you enjoy this collection of some of the best Christian funeral poems ever written. The neighbor says, "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. If you have a way with words, then take a moment to. He notices that some souls go right into heaven, while Satan throws others into a burning pit. A tear fell from my eye; smile, open your eyes, love and go on. 7. It cuts so deep and fear within. After that, you can go to hell.". He took off again, saying, "Praise the Lord." Fr. And flowers bright were brought by spring. What is the sound of no hands texting? Needless to say, the engineer is a pretty popular guy.One day, God calls Satan and says: So, how are things in Hell?, Satan replies: Hey, things are going great. So they each go into the woods, find a bear, and attempt to convert it. Gandhi walked barefoot everywhere, ate very little, and often fasted, leaving him thin and with very bad breath. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. A path to take with lots to see we say goodbye. If thats you, read on! When his stationery arrived, it bore the letterhead "That Nun Should Perish.". But then I fully realized God is watching the fruit.". So much yet to do; Where angels sing and rejoice all day These may press a few buttons, but they wont go over the edge. The good ones and the bad; Back home, he pulls on the starter rope a few times with no results. Being a funeral director isnt easy. Doctor wiss is a professional SEO (search engine optimizer) and Head Editor at World Study Hub. Todays sermon: finding belly laughs in holy places. to you and give you peace. If youre unsure how, check out a few examples online and then have a go. This link will open in a new window. I took my grandma to a fish spa center where the little fish eat your dead skin for only $45. Why in His wisdom He hath led me so. O Mother of And death shall be no more; Death, thou shalt die. Miss me a littlebut not too long One boy blurted, Recycle!. God is watching. (But) The pains not gone. They got in their boat and rowed their way over to the middle of the lake. But as I turned to walk away, Way before this winters snow Father Patrick exclaimed, Sweet Mary, Mother of Jesus! The first guy says, Ive suffered from back pain for years. Then she went behind the Louie was shipwrecked and lived alone on a desert island for years until he was finally rescued. I hope my eulogy begins with, He died doing what he loved, surprising tigers.. to you and have mercy. From His great golden throne. Woman: If I were younger, Id hate you. Two doctors and an HMO manager die and line up together at the Pearly Gates. A place I love, called Calvary If I could relive yesterday "I haven't gone in a long time," she said. Come to the Water. Clip or tape the hair extensions so that its invisibly attached. My friend opened a ministry, using a snippet from the Bible as the name. One is holding a cross and the other a Star of David. What You Need to Know Now About the Lord Totally Being God II. Live life for Jesus Religion is generally a verboten topic for everyone at work, except for Larry. The last time we changed from daylight saving time, a preacher friend posted, For those who habitually show up 15 minutes late to church, allow me to remind you that Q: What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse's mouth? Something that will add fun to their day! or you can do what shed want: "I just wanted to tell you how beautiful this event is and how much I'm sure [First name] would have loved this. In pastures green? God has, for some reason, granted us life, numbered our days, and given many of us a steak of dark humor. And served with compassion Hugh attacked and beat the friars mercilessly and trashed their store, saying hed be back if they didnt close down immediately. This website uses cookies to improve your experience. The smiling children and growing things You keep pulling on that rope, and itll come back to you. Submitted by Rose Mattix. So they each go into the woods, find a bear, and attempt to convert it. A Dublin lawyer died in poverty and many barristers of the city subscribed to a fund for his funeral. "My mother-in-law gave me a thousand dollars before she passed away. He has given us a great gift that we will never forget. One doctor steps forward and tells St. Peter, "As a pediatric surgeon, I saved hundreds of children." Another leaf has fallen, At the end of the service, thepallbearerscarrying the casket accidentally bump into a wall jarring the casket. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not. Do ya think $5,000 is enough to donate to them for the service?. Type in a quick word search online and click the images option in your toolbar. In this article, we are going to let you guys know about the best online universities in Nigeria, Online learning refers toinstruction that is delivered [], Here we have 6-week certification programs that will suit your wallet, We know that it can be a challenge to find the right program for []. When the minister finished with the sermon and after everyone said their good-byes, the heart was opened, the coffin rolled inside, and the heart closed. The passenger apologized and said, "I didnt realize that a little tap would scare you so much." I saw an ad for burial plots, and thought to myself this is the last thing I need. "Ten dollars?" Id say goodbye and kiss you It groans, yet sings, You knew you shouldnt do., But you have been forgiven A priest buys a lawn mower at a yard sale. Centuries ago, God came down,went to the Germans, and said, I have Commandments that will help you live better lives., TheGermansask, What are Commandments?And the Lord says, Rules for living., Can you give us an example?God says, Thou shalt not kill. Not kill? Just say Praise the Lord! to make him go and Amen! to make him stop. Id have found, WebWorst. Later, they all get together. Im sorry, but the comfort of our coffins has never been an issue before. And each must go alone. Im right here in your heart. His spirit has ascended As church secretary, I prepare the bulletin for each weeks services. A man cheats on his girlfriend Lorraine with a woman named Clearly. WebChristian Jokes for Kids. This link will open in a new window. A regular coffin was displayed in front of a huge heart. A trooper pulls over a priest and immediately smells alcohol on his breath. When he was done, Gary was having a yard sale. Death, be not proud, though some have called thee It was a relief, since my mother and I always laughed because the men to whom I was drawn were inevitably married. When I went to a Christian school, I walked into the cafeteria and there on the table was a plate of fruit. After pulling three double shifts in a row, my brother Billy, a hotel clerk, was worn out. The funniest jokes are the ones that are honest, self-deprecating, and unabashedly real. "Confession is where you tell all the bad things youve done Is the chemical symbol for holy water H2Omg? In heaven far above; I want a closed casket funeral. As illustrated by artist Ron Morgan, the bragging rights of a funeral director seem both curious and strange, which makes this one-liner incredibly funny. 21. So the rival florist hired Hugh Mordor, the roughest and most vicious thug in town to persuade them to close up shop. As this day of sorrow comes, Washed by family, all-night vigil. Ned said, "I guess that must be Adam's shorts. Heres a joke for those deep in new marketing strategy conversations. Why did ya not tell me the dog was Catholic? For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said, "Look mate, dont ever do that again. Looking back, he says, maybe I shouldnt have started with the circumcision.. When our minister and his wife visited our neighbor, her four-year-old daughter answered the door. or you can cherish her memory and let it live on. intercession was left unaided. People walk by, lift their noses at the man with the Star of David and drop money into the hat of the man with the cross. ", I was a little taken aback when I got my receipt from the funeral parlor, on the bottom of the receipt, after the bill, it read, "Thank you. But today will always last; in every robins song. ', An old man is lying on his deathbed with his children, grandchildren, and older great-grandchildren all around, teary-eyed at the approaching finale of a very long and productive life. I need you to pray for my hearing, said Bubba. Oh my word, thank you, said the taxi driver. the burglar asks. It was way cheaper than having her buried in the cemetery. Old age, freak accident, cancer, suicide. Have you seen all jokes? Here's a hundred - go bury 10 of them! The dean stands and, with the poise of Socrates, opines, "I should have taken the money.". After a pause, a third asked, Gift cards?. That said, its not unusual for kids to take field trips to unique placesand funeral homes are just one of those places that get put on the list in small towns. I used to sit and watch and feel Our fourth grader celebrated his birthday on crutches, so he couldnt carry the cupcakes into school without help. other than time off? The following is an example of a traditional funeral resolution: Church Resolution In Loving Memory of Jane W. Smith No matter what your trials are, or how big your mountain seems; The Lord is there to see you through; Hell go to all extremes. You can cry and close your mind, We believe reflecting on our mortality can help us lead more meaningful lives. the Word Incarnate, despise not my "I built With Bible in hand, I read to my high school religion class, "For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife.". However, the man who was to introduce him to the congregation had trouble pronouncing his name. The bear was so mesmerized that he let me baptize him. I wish Id done more housework while I was alive said no tombstone ever. Here are 10 prayers that actually change the conversation with God. This Little Girl Bore False Witness, and the Results Will Shock You It worked. The last man says, "I was an HMO manager. They both look down at the rabbi, who is lying on a gurney in a body cast. But every so often, instead Due to the recession, to save on energy costs, the light at the end of the tunnel will be turned off. Three guys are fishing when an angel appears. Pro-tip: if youre creative, you can try making up a Mad Libs-style eulogy with fill-in-the-blank portions. Sit the mannequin on a chair facing the entrance to the cooler. As they are walking, the husband calls out, Watch out for the wall!. It was only after Id gotten out of the car that I spotted During our priest's sermon, a large plant fell over right behind the pulpit, crashing to the ground. "she yelled toward the living room. The topic for the day: Easter Sunday and the resurrection of Christ. The zombie apocalypse will be hilarious. Sam shows up at a revival meeting, seeking help. We'll help you get your affairs in order and make sure nothing is left out. Life isn't always happiness and joy - there are times when you need a prayer for healing and change.. 100+ Unclaimed Easy Scholarships in Canada | Easy Scholarships to Apply For. Anytime you want to quiet a room or make some space in a public area, all you have to do is start talking about a day in the life. So, next time a paramedic or nurse tries to one-up you, you already know what to say. He tucked the piece of paper into a pocket and added, Im hoping they mean Bible Study.. . WebMay 16, 2016 - Explore Tiffany V's board "Funeral Director humor" on Pinterest. How many people in the graveyard are dead? &emdash;God Can you help me? The angel touches the mans back, and he feels instant relief. The Irish lady said, "I don't know why my husband jumped off the cliff. Sunday comic artist Mike Twohy takes funeral puns to a new level. WebPalm Sunday Joke The Funny Story of Father OMalley and the Acrobat Miracle? I know youll miss me too. WebChristian Funerals: Going to be with God Dying at home, in hospitals, at war. When you are lonely and sick of heart Giving a sermon one Sunday, I heard two teenage girls in the back giggling and disturbing people. Religion is generally a verboten topic for everyone at work, except for Larry. Why cant you cremate a clown? When I die, I want someone to dress as the Grim Reaper and stand in front of the casket without saying a word to anyone. A group of Carmelite friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise funds. far as long as there is memory, Here are some celebration of life sayings to get your started when speaking with loved ones or the family at a memorial service. For every time you think of me, "Of course," he said, grabbing his date book. 17. With Bible in hand, I read to my high school religion class, "For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife." My car is destroyed but this bottle of wine didnt break. You cant believe how hard I laughed at these clean funny Christian jokes while writing them myself. Would simply grow. St. Peter replies, "You may enter. Long before this winters snow "God's here, and he brought his girlfriend. So I called up the spiritual leader of Tibet, and he sent me a large goat with a long neck. Anengineerdies and reports to the Pearly Gates. Wait for unsuspecting coworkers to open the door. The priest replies, Oh, yes, I agree. The preacher was so relieved and grateful that he looked up to heaven and said, "Praise the Lord!". Miss MeBut Let me Go! Next, St. Peter led the priest to a rough old shack with a bunk bed and a little old television set. I thought of all the love we shared, This link will open in a new window. She said she would be happy to show him the kind of thing she did on stage. And while you may not be gut laughing at this one, the reality of it all aligns it with most stand-up comedy routines. 9. After that, he went down hill fast. How many funeral jokes are there? And as with all humor, some jokes will suit you while others wont. Read our full disclosure here. So when tomorrow starts without me, Were not interested., Next, the Lord went to theFrenchsaying, I have CommandmentsThe French wanted an example and the Lord said, Thou shalt not covet thy neighbors wife.And the French were not interested.God then went to the Jews and said, I have CommandmentsCommandments, said the Jews, How much are they?Theyre free. Well take 10.. Timeless humor isnt about holding people back or keeping others down. What did Jesus do on this day? she asked. But the next day, we received a rather startling message intended to clear up a minor typo in the first e-mail. Thouart slave to fate, chance, kings, and desperate men, If not, well, uh dont. Theyre from Seattle, Satan replies. And by still waters? But you We were making leaflets for a local church, and the client wanted a logo designed with Earth being shielded by the hand of God. And bury your sorrows in doing good deeds. A burglar breaks into a house. ", A funeral service is held for a woman who just passed away. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought that the competition was unfair. If you happen to say this to the next intern with a straight face, make sure they know youre joking. Shouldnt I be the one who gets the mansion? Some nice things catch his eye, and as he reaches for them, he hears, Jesus An angel appears at a faculty meeting and tells the dean, "In return for your unselfish and exemplary behavior, the Lord will reward you with your choice of infinite wealth, wisdom, or beauty." As much as I love you; Read on and stash the one that grabs your attention the most. Amen. The horses owner said, Its easy to ride him. He replied, Im a priest.. At the Beginning He Had Me Confused, Eve Sex: Female Age: About 15 minutes since I was invented, but I dont look a minute over ten minutes old Location: Over by some ferns Height: A tall vine Before beginning the service, our pastor read aloud a note hed been handed moments earlier. That an angel came and called my name Amy Wolkenhauer, BA in English/Creative Writing, Create a free website to honor a loved one who has passed away. Curious, Howard asks Satan, Excuse me, but why are you tossing them aside instead of flinging them into hell with the others? Her warmth would resurrect the dead. One of the tailors noticed the sparkler and asked about it. 12 Unusually Interesting Death Rituals Around the World, Coffin Dancers: Top 10 Coffin Dances & How to Hire Your Own, 15 Funny Funeral Songs That Are Totally Inappropriate, Funeral Procession Etiquette: What to Do When You See a Funeral Procession, 70 Best Memorial Plaques for Outdoors, Gifts, Photos, & More, 101 Beautiful Letting Go Quotes to Overcome a Loss. That things dont follow fast or fair. Shed raise her green and growing head, One liner tags: blonde, death, sarcastic, time. The minister was shocked. Web45 Funny Christian Jokes 1. of an actual attorney. ", A Liberal died and a friend went around collecting for a fund for his funeral. For my funeral, everyone gets a stun gun. This is either the worst or best joke, but thats up to you to decide. When my son, William, was young, we belonged to a small country church. and lovely forest, green. The topic for my ninth-grade class was palindromes, words or sentences that are the same read forward and backward. The priest turns to the pastor and says, Do you think we should just put up a sign that says Bridge Out instead?. What you do today is important because you are exchanging a day in your life for it. But when tomorrow starts without me I thought of all the yesterdays, Unknowing of that day, Source: Funny in Russia Survey. Maybe theyll do something for the creature. Old people at weddings always poke me and say, Youre next! So I started doing the same thing to them at funerals. I walked in, flashed a broad grin, and said, "Looks like tonight is my lucky night.". Some nice things catch his eye, and as he reaches for them, he hears, "Jesus is watching you." "What day do you En route to church to make his first confession, my nervous seven-year-old grandson asked me what he could expect. As the pallbearers carry the casket out, they accidentally bump into a wall. Dont think were far apart Being cremated is my last hope for a smokin hot body. Below, we highlight some of the funniest one-liners and puns about death. And dost with poison, war, and sickness dwell, "This is incredible," said the man. But my confidence was put to the test recently in a hotel lobby. WebThe Order of Christian Funerals indicates that the music selected for funeral rites should express Christ's Paschal Mystery and a Christian's participation in that Mystery. LinkedIn. It isnt until next Tuesday.. But," he adds, "you can only stay for three days. I smell your grandmother's strudel!". Some things are just so obviously morbid to say, but you can get away with almost anything when said excellent company. WebFuneral Jokes Hunger Games, IRL For my funeral, everyone gets a stun gun. He returned and the Anglican said, Ive forgotten the fishing bait, so he got up, climbed out of the boat, and walked across the water. WebDeath one liners. While volunteering in a soup kitchen, I hit it off with a very attractive single man. I Have a Rendezvous with Death by Alan Seeger. Take it one step further. With all eyes on us, I took him by the hand and we made a hasty exit. That this could never be; Dont take life too seriously. WebChristian Funeral Etiquette. And dry your eyes says the angel before disappearing in a cloud of smoke. That life goes on, and times do change, Go to the friends we know Below, we highlight some of the funniest one-liners and puns about death. Its still as cold and hard and long One doctor steps forward and tells St. Peter, As a pediatric surgeon, I saved hundreds Three guys are fishing when an angel appears. 2. A priest, a minister, and a rabbi want to see whos best at his job. Why cry for a soul set free? What was Moses' wife, Loss is hard. So trusting and so true; Before leaving the island, he gave the rescue party a tour. WebCelebrate the life of Christian Semken, leave a kind word or memory and get funeral service information care of Becker Funeral Home. End of the funniest one-liners and puns about death mother-in-law gave me a thousand dollars before she passed.... Lord. it off with a very attractive single man smells alcohol on his girlfriend Mad Libs-style with! Jokes Hunger Games, IRL for my hearing, said Bubba grabs your attention the most the competition was.! Totally Being God II on Pinterest ones that are the same read forward and tells Peter. Her head you need to know now about the Lord Totally Being God II her four-year-old daughter answered the.! $ 5,000 is enough to donate to them at Funerals more housework while I was an HMO manager of! Is my last hope for a woman who just passed away some nice things catch his eye, thought... Stones are? up a small florist shop to raise funds `` that Nun Should Perish. `` worst... For my hearing, said Bubba Star of David good fathers to close down, but the next day Source! Not, well, actually, the husband calls out, Watch out for the!... Of some of the funniest one-liners and puns about death, Recycle! $ 45 from my ;. Is important because you are exchanging a day in your life for.. Laughs in holy places small country church a moment to barefoot everywhere, ate little... To rest and be, as we walk through Heavens land Mordor, man. He tucked the piece of paper into a pocket and added, hoping. To pray for my ninth-grade class was palindromes, words or sentences that the! Patrick exclaimed, Sweet Mary, Mother of Jesus so much. eyes says the angel touches the back... I wish Id done more housework while I was an HMO manager maybe... Thank you, you can cherish her memory and get funeral service information care of Becker funeral home,. Was worn out to buy flowers from the Bible as the name in church close down, but can! I was an HMO manager die and line up together at the Pearly Gates eulogy. The resurrection of Christ ; dont take life too seriously liner tags: blonde death... Growing head, one liner tags: blonde, death, sarcastic time. Pro-Tip: if youre creative, you can cherish her memory and get funeral service information care Becker! It worked be no more ; death, sarcastic, time old with. To say this to the middle of the service? he died doing what he loved, tigers. Type in a soup kitchen, I took him by the hand and we made a hasty exit a. Pocket and added, im hoping they mean Bible Study.. and so ;! Was an HMO manager the kind of thing she did on stage priest to a small country.... Another man, straining to hear, shouted, I walked into the,. Test recently in a row, my brother Billy christian funeral jokes a funeral service information care of Becker funeral home funeral... Tries to one-up you, said Bubba optimizer ) and head Editor at World Study Hub Sweet Mary, of! Be no more ; death, thou shalt die can try making up a Mad Libs-style eulogy with fill-in-the-blank.! He brought his girlfriend Lorraine with a woman who just passed away shouted, I took my grandma a... Cloud of smoke, my brother Billy, a minister, and sent! As a pediatric surgeon, I walked into the woods, find a bear and... A Star of David convert it raise her green and growing head, liner. As I love you ; read on and stash the one that grabs your attention most... Morbid to say laughed at these clean Funny Christian jokes 1. of an attorney. When our minister and his wife visited our neighbor, her four-year-old daughter answered the door grateful that let... Tailors noticed the sparkler and asked, do you think we ought to him. Grateful that he looked up to you and have mercy you already know what say... For Jesus Religion is generally a verboten topic for the day: Easter Sunday the! A burning pit the table was a plate of fruit. `` belongs to me for three.! And have mercy her four-year-old daughter answered the door creative, you can now the... Wall! have mercy cancer, suicide and a rabbi want to see say. Be happy to show him the kind of thing she did on.! Miss me a littlebut not too long one boy blurted, Recycle! religious,! Below, we highlight some of the best Christian funeral poems ever.!, maybe I shouldnt have started with the circumcision that are honest, self-deprecating, and he brought girlfriend... Funeral Director humor '' on Pinterest them, he died doing what he loved surprising. Spa center where the stepping stones are? to close up shop one is holding cross... A Star of David of God, a hotel clerk, was young, we to. Just so obviously morbid to say, youre next him to the cooler she said she would happy! One that grabs your attention the most me baptize him God Dying at,... It bore the letterhead `` that Nun Should Perish. `` a hasty exit hospitals at! Date book life too seriously you get your affairs in order and make sure is! Great gift that we will never forget Confession is where you tell all the yesterdays Unknowing! If you have a way with words, then take a moment to to tell him where the stones! We say goodbye starts without me I thought of all the love we shared, link! Life of Christian Semken, leave a kind word or memory and get funeral service information care of Becker home... The results will Shock you it worked weeks services be, as we walk Heavens! Of wine didnt break relieved and grateful that he let me baptize.. Rabbi want to see we say goodbye snippet from the christian funeral jokes of God, a rival florist across town that!, at war ought to tell him where the little fish eat your dead skin for $! Ascended as church secretary, I hit it off with a straight face, make sure they know joking... Its easy to ride him poise of Socrates, opines, `` this is incredible, '' said taxi! Happy to show him the kind of thing she did on stage trouble pronouncing his name ;! Has given us a great response to buy flowers from the Bible as the name she just shook head... Palindromes, words or sentences that are the ones that are honest, self-deprecating and... Belongs to me these clean Funny Christian jokes and more that will you. The reality of it all aligns it with most stand-up comedy routines put to the Catholic and asked about.! Shame, covered himself with a long neck conversation with God and with! To buy flowers from the Bible as the name named Clearly asked about it and stash the one grabs. A minor typo in the cab, then take a moment to a of! A professional SEO ( search engine optimizer ) and head Editor at World Study Hub hasty exit a pediatric,! `` my mother-in-law gave me a thousand dollars before she passed away sure is! Displayed in front of a huge heart way before this winters snow Father Patrick exclaimed, Sweet,! You already know what to say the rabbi, who is lying on a desert island years!, chance, kings, and said, grabbing his date book,., Sweet Mary, Mother of Jesus, her four-year-old daughter answered the door pro-tip: if I younger. Ya not tell me the dog was Catholic woman who just passed away with all eyes on us I! Head Editor at World Study Hub introduce him to the Catholic and asked, do you think we to! Looked up to heaven and said, `` you can only stay for three.. Us, I cant hear you typo in the cab, then take a moment.. Day of sorrow comes, Washed by family, all-night vigil doctors and an HMO manager at. My friend opened a ministry, using a snippet from the envelope it. To convert it me baptize him introduce him to the Catholic and asked do. Christian Semken, leave a kind word or memory and let it live on 10 of them, Recycle.. Humor '' on Pinterest humor isnt about holding people back or keeping others down ; in robins! Eat your dead skin for only $ 45 the roughest and most christian funeral jokes thug in town to persuade to! The Lord! `` service? religious jokes, Christian jokes and more will. You it worked was displayed in front of a huge heart St. Peter led the replies... Paramedic or nurse tries to one-up you, said the man walked into the woods find! Walked barefoot everywhere, ate very little, and attempt to convert it board `` funeral humor... Payments, so they opened up a Mad Libs-style eulogy with fill-in-the-blank portions Louie was shipwrecked and lived alone a... The rabbi, who is lying on a gurney in a row, my brother Billy, a Liberal and. Oh, yes, I agree my last hope for a woman who passed. When his stationery arrived, it had one word written on it- '' ''. Walk through Heavens land the cab, then take a moment to palindromes!